Dating after wls

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Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or piece dating experiences etc. Whatever feels right to you. If you go to meet someone, make sure a friend always knows where you are and the name of your date. Can you help be my cheerleaders to meet my goals this year. With all the new energy that is bubbling out of you, you may have enough energy to date every night. I keep hoping I can meet a man maybe who has also lost weight or is losing or just someone that loves to work dating after wls with me. When my husband was scheduled for a trip over U, Rosie and I had originally planned to spend those days kicking back in pajamas and watching Christmas movies. I do best when I have a supply of nuts, jerky, dried fruit, and bars tucked in my desk or glove box.

Page 1 of 1 Has anyone had weight loss surgery and then tried to date? I've lost 125 pounds and am now 118 pounds and am a size 2. I'm really proud of the accomplishment and wok out every day. My problem is that when I tell people the reaction is very hard. I can't date someone for too long without saying something because the inevitable questions always come up about not eating and really small portions. Also, the reaction with the few people I fdid tell was really negative. I think men are either afraid you are going to get heavy again, or they are turned off that you ever were. It's hard when you've worked SO hard at something and then don't know what to do. I don't ever want to be heavy again, so I have to eat tiny portions the rest of my life. Also, the skin is a really scary issue and would give me away too. I've had a tummy tuck, but can't afford other plastic surgery. Two men I told who had been going on and on about what a great figure I had and how tiny and petite I was looked at me like I had suddenly grown horns and never called again. What is the best way to handle this? Actually, I'm glad that they reacted in a negative manner or expressed hesitancy to become involved with me so as to not waste my time or theirs by pretending it did not matter. That's kind of what I was thinking too, that perhaps I was meeting the wrong fellas. I think the hardest thing is when I go out to eat with someone, I think they think I am obsessed with not eating or have anorexia or something and they start asking questions which brings up the whole pandora's box of how to answer. So far, I'm still losing weight and my goal is 105-110, so I just say I'm trying to lose 10 pounds, but I'm not sure what I'll do when I hit 105 and still have to eat tiny portions. I had one man who insisted on buying me desert despite my saying I didn't want any. I took one bite, but literally can't eat more than one because the sugar makes me sick. I think he was kind of offended, but I didn't know how to explain. I didn't want to lie and say I was diabetic or something, but it was a first date and I didn't want to bring up a gastric bypass either. I want to date someone who is health conscious too so that I don't slide back into bad habits. On the other hand, a man with a few extra pounds might be much more understanding of what I've been through. I was kind of surprised how negative some of the reactions were, but I guess I shouldn't have been given the detrimental health effects of obesity not to mention how it looks. This is the hardest thing I've ever done. It's just a tool and I have to watch everything that I do, exercise really hard. It's an entire life change. I'm just hoping I can meet a nice man that understands I was trying to make a really positive lifestyle change, rather than judge me for what's in the past. I keep hoping I can meet a man maybe who has also lost weight or is losing or just someone that loves to work out with me. I have to admit I went on one date with a man who was going on and on about how slim I was and how the last woman he met had to be at least 200 pounds. Like I was ever going to tell him about my surgery! Geesh, wanna hear about all of mine? LOL I doubt if any guy would! I've had several, to correct my body. That's my opinon, for what it's worth. IF a relationship does develop and you both WANT to share all your tales of childhood sickness, times in hospitals, surgeries, etc. I lost 120 post surgery although I did not ever have weight lose surgery as bnasically spent 2 years changing eating habits and the gym. I then had my tummy tuck 4 months ago... I had a lot of skin a incrediable 10llbs taken off! I have to say I have not had many bad reactions to be frank and the majority of guys I have dated have been more shocked by the deterimination I had to lose the weight and then have the surgery. I did have one bad reaction though! When I told him he basically said it was cheating that getting that tummy tuck was a false way of losing weight... I did 200 more sit ups and crunchs and 60 more push ups. After the work out he had the nerve to ask me if I wanted to go out with him more.... My line of thought is that if they do not react badly before they know you then they may be a keeper. Rather then getting slightly attached to the guy thinking all is good and then telling him to get a potentially bad reaction or a negative one, this will only knock your confidence and you DO NOT NEED THAT! It is not going to come back, if they start asking questions just say you already had a large lunch,dinner,breakfast or whatever, if they keep pestering you, tell them to mind their own business. You might somewhere down the road but not the first few dates, besides they may have been ignorant judgmental jerks before and wouldnt admit it. Just have a good talk with your new self and get comfortable with the new size... I'm not over weight or obese but if I was faced with the surgery I'd be so scared. I'm not sure what I'd do. It's great to see some really brave people who made a personal decision to help them take their bodies back. I agree with some of the others. You don't have to tell anybody up front. Like others have said, say you aren't very hungry. Or that you normally eat small meals instead of large portions, etc. Whatever feels right to you. In time obviously you'd tell the person you're seeing because it's something positive you did for yourself. I've talked to two guys on here who have had weight loss surgery and both are awesome people, though they live kind of far away. I'm actually shocked those guys you met had such an odd reaction to it. No matter what, be proud of yourself. I bet more guys would look past it then not. I'm willing to bet we all have something some people would consider deal breakers. You just have to go through a few jerks and a few not right for each others to find the right guy for you. You just have to keep looking and pull strength from your loved ones and your support group.

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